Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Disappearing Acts

This little light of mine? Her monster factor just tripled. She refuses to get dressed or have her diaper changed. She wants ice cream for dinner. She approaches stranger after stranger and holds her arms out for them to hold her or pick her up. I don't understand half of what she says because she only pronounces the first syllable of every word, but still strings them together to make sentences.

I'm exhausted and nauseous. All the time. How do people take care of themselves and more than one tiny monster?

I love being with her, but right now the routine of staying home and caretaking is seriously wearing on me. I need a break or a vacation, but there's no escape other than a quickie because the weight of motherhood never leaves you no matter where you run off to or for how long. It's wonderful but exhausting and for forever and always.

I'm feeling overwhelmed and overdone. It's so strange to know that you wouldn't change a thing or choose to be anywhere else but right where you are, and yet you still feel like disappearing. No matter how many magnificently beautiful things fill your daily routine, it's still a routine. And sometimes it's crushing.


Stephanie said...

Every mom feels this way. Hell, I felt this way when I didn't have kids and had to go to the same office and do the same job every day. It is routine and sometimes it gets to you. Time for a tropical vacation!

Zoe said...

We all feel this way now and then. Perfectly normal. People just don't always talk about it.

Alison said...

I've been feeling the same. It's tough to be cooped up all day with your little ones even though you love them to pieces. They require so much of us physically and emotionally. We'd be crazy if we didn't feel this way once in awhile.

Anonymous said...

You're just human like the rest of us :)


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